General Hospital, Second City, and Cult Restaurants

Patty here…

GENERAL HOSPITAL

I did extensive research this week on the healthcare industry, though not by design. Monday I took my mother to the ER again, an experience sure to test anyone’s patience. We got there around five or so. The decision to admit her was made at 10:30 p.m. She finally got a room at about four the next morning. Tuesday was spent springing her out, arranging for a private 24/7 caregiver, and picking up medications from the drugstore. I finally got home at around eight.

On Wednesday my mother called at 7:00 a.m. I was still asleep.

“I’m having a heart attack,” she said.

“WHAAAAAAAAAAA???!!!!”

“…and my TV doesn’t work.”

“Describe the symptoms.”

“Nelly thinks the battery in my clicker is dead.”

“Not the TV’s symptoms. Yours. I want to know about your ticker not your clicker.”

“Actually, I took a couple of nitro tablets and I feel much better now.”

It was only 7:15 but I already needed a nap.

That night I was at a friend’s house and fell down the steps leading from her dining room to her living room, which gives new meaning to the word KLUTZ. My ankle hurt. A lot. I drove home but the next morning I visited a UCLA urgent care doc. My ankle wasn’t broken. He told me ankles were hard to break. Mine was just badly sprained (I just can’t do anything right.) He wanted to give me an “air cast.”

“What does it look like?” I said.

“Like a pair of Jimmy Choo shoes. You’ll be stylin’.”

He smiled. He was wearing braces.

“Are you sure you’re old enough to be a doctor? How about showing me some ID?”

He laughed. I wasn’t joking.

He told me to keep my leg elevated and iced, take 600 mg of Ibuprofen every 6 hours, and no driving.

Puh-LEEEZ. One can’t keep one’s leg elevated and still work at the computer editing one’s fourth manuscript. And that driving ban? I mean, seriously. This is L.A. That just ain’t gonna happen, especially since my favorite Cheese Doodles can only be found at the Vons supermarket five blocks away.

SECOND CITY

Saturday night, against doctor’s orders, I went to a sold-out performance of “Rich Like Astronauts,” at The Second City Training Center Los Angeles. The young man who lives in my neighbor’s guesthouse is in their writing program. A comedy sketch he’d penned was being performed by a troupe of kids in the acting program. So off I went to the heart of Hollywood.

I gimped up a flight of narrow stairs to the second floor theatre where I found the lobby filled with a crowd of twenty-somethings watching videos on cell phones and talking about MySpace, SmallSpace, and all things totally awesome.

The theatre was a bit decrepit (a requirement) with about 50 seats and no air conditioning. And don't even get me started about the restroom. I fanned myself with the program and studied the tangle of electrical wires on the floor of the stage. They looked as if they’d been there since Thomas Edison’s last trip to L.A. I wondered how fast I could hobble down those stairs in case of a fire.

I sat in the front row about three feet from the stage. To get an idea of how intimate the space was I turned around to get a look at the crowd and nearly bit off the toe of the shoeless man sitting behind me.

The young man’s sketch was funny. He set it up and paid it off in a big way. He’ll go far. But by the time I got home, my foot looked like one of the balloons in the Macy’s Thanksgiving parade.

CULT RESTAURANTS

And speaking of health...food. When I first moved to L.A. I discovered a restaurant on the Sunset Strip called The Source. The food was healthy and good and it had that laid-back hippie vibe, which was an irresistible combo for a girl from Yakima. You can imagine my surprise when I read an article in Sunday’s Los Angeles Times and discovered the place was run by a cult led by Father Yod AKA YaHoWah AKA Jim Baker. There’s a new book out about both called “The Source: The Untold Story of Father Yod, YaHoWa 13 and the Source Family” by Isis Aquarian AKA Charlene Peters. (Why do Cults and AKAs always seem to go hand-in-hand?)

“Imagine your fantasy commune, the one you’d find only in the movies, where everyone is young and beautiful; the clothes are fabulous; the leader benign; and home is a mansion in the Hollywood Hills. Chances are it probably looks a lot like the Source Family, whose 140 members “dropped out” right in the middle of Los Angeles.”

I wonder if they take people with stylin' air casts?



AND THIS JUST IN! J.K. ROWLING AT WORK ON CRIME NOVEL

By DAVID STRINGER,AP
Posted: 2007-08-19 17:06:04
LONDON (Aug. 19) - J.K. Rowling has been spotted at cafes in Scotland working on a detective novel, a British newspaper reported Saturday.

The Sunday Times newspaper quoted Ian Rankin, a fellow author and neighbor of Rowling's, as saying the creator of the "Harry Potter" books is turning to crime fiction.

Upon completing 'The Deathly Hallows,' the final installment in the Harry Potter saga, J.K. Rowling said she was burnt out, "I just want to take a break. I really do." Now it appears she's already back at work.

"My wife spotted her writing her Edinburgh criminal detective novel," the newspaper, which was available late Saturday, quoted Rankin as telling a reporter at an Edinburgh literary festival.

"It is great that she has not abandoned writing or Edinburgh cafes," said Rankin, who is known for his own police novels set in the historic Scottish city.

Rowling famously wrote initial drafts of the Potter story in the Scottish city's cafes. Back then, she was a struggling single mother who wrote in cafes to save on the heating bill at home.

Now she's Britain's richest woman - worth $1 billion, according to Forbes magazine - and her seven Potter books have sold more than 335 million copies worldwide.

In an interview with The Associated Press last month, Rowling said she believed she was unlikely to repeat the success of the Potter series, but confirmed she had plans to work on new books.

"I'll do exactly what I did with Harry - I'll write what I really want to write," Rowling said.

The office of Rowling's literary agent, Christopher Little, was not immediately available to comment late Saturday.

Just when you thought it was safe to leave your computer...Happy Monday!