Patty here…
I had lunch with a friend the other day and as we were leaving the restaurant, she mentioned in passing one of my biggest pet peeves: people who leave their shopping cart parked centimeters from the fender of your car when they could just as easily have returned it to the designated shopping cart area located ONLY STEPS AWAY. And don’t even get me started on the people who walk home with the carts and then abandon them at the curb in front of somebody else’s house.
Maybe this is just an L.A. phenom, but here’s the deal, you folks. The grocery store has to hire people to drive around the neighborhood to pick up those abandoned carts. Do you think that service is free? Huh-uh. It costs money. Money that ultimately gets added to your grocery bill—and mine.
This one’s a biggie. People who cut in front of me on the freeway when there’s NOBODY behind me in the lane. What’s with that? The rule is you can cut in front of me as long as I don’t have to slam on my brakes. If I have to brake, use your signal so I can slow down and make room for you. Better yet, go behind me where the lane is FREAKIN EMPTY.
Here are some of my other pet peeves:
People who drive too slow.
People who lie to me.
People who make me redo something because they withheld information.
People who ask me to critique their manuscripts when what they really want is for me to confirm they’re the next Hemingway.
People who RSVP and then no-show.
People who don't RSVP at all.
Sales clerks who go on gossiping with a coworker while I’m standing at the cash register waiting to buy something.
People who never talk about anything but themselves.
It’s Monday, the beginning of the workweek. What better time to vent about pet peeves? Your snarky sister invites you to dish.
A cop, a Brit, a deb, a B-school grad, a guy with good hair, and a wisecracking lawyer wrestle with the naked truth about literature and life.
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You hit a couple of my faves, Patty. And I'd add:
ReplyDelete* speed bumps
* shipping costs that are larger than the purchase price of my online order
* news anchors who use phrases like "positive optimism"
Patty, or should I be calling you Go-Lo, or {GAK} Angelina Jolie;
ReplyDeleteliars and lying has always been a fascinating "pet peeve" of mine....although pet peeve is putting it extremely mildly.
"Liars when they speak the truth are not believed."
Aristotle
"People who lie to me." are probably the same people who "make me redo something because they withheld information." Lies come in two forms, omission and commission.
"Liars pay the penalty of their own misdeeds"
Phaedrus
A problem with that viewpoint is that it neglects to see the PENALTY {IES} that those who are lied to must also pay.........A good example is our Il Duce and his administration....
It is the most destructive when people who we trust, friends, loved ones, lie to us. That it is the most damaging.
I dare say we have a common thread tying all your pet peeves together:" People who never talk about anything but themselves."
The thread is "IT'S ALL ABOUT ME." These are the people who while making love, yell out their OWN name. Such egotist are the same ones who leave shopping carts in front of your car, feel free to lie or omit as THEY see fit.....basically the world revolves around them and what they want.
It reminds me of a comedienne, who I saw many many years ago and who's name escapes me, who tells the following joke:
"I've been in psychotherapy for years and years, and I've finally figured out what my problem is. I think I 'm a piece of shit, that the world revolves around."
Jon
Yeow!!! I'd forgotten about speed bumps. One of my neighbors tried to get me to sign a petition (and contribute moolah) to get the city to add them to our street. I told her no way.
ReplyDeleteNever heard "positive optimism." As Rae would say, "Gak!"
Jon, loved your comments (as usual). I agree that there's nothing worse than being betrayed by somebody you trust. Il Duce's lies weren't that hard to swallow because I never trusted him in the first place.
ReplyDeleteParis Hilton. "Gak!"
ReplyDeletePeople not using turn signals. There is a reason that I'm looking for them!
So...if I ask you to read my manuscript, and tell you that it's to confirm that I'm the next Hemingway, you're okay with that? :D
The shopping cart thing is huge. And why is Trader Joe's ground zero for the worst offenders? I thought the folks who shopped there were supposed to be a little more enlightened. Turns out that what they are is a lot more entitled. They probably pay out hefty gym memberships, and drive yuppier cars, which you would think makes it in their interest to take the carts back. But there is a walkway where it is very easy to leave those carts. Nice because the only folks who use it are the old folks from the home across the street. The ones with the walkers.
ReplyDeleteI'm talking to you, Huntington Beach Five Points Trader Joes. Yeah, you.
Oh, and littering. Oh, wait--I forgot that that's what janitors and flood control channels are for.
Thanks for this opportunity, Patty.
Jeff, for you anything.
ReplyDeleteYay, Mims. Tell it like it is, mama!
Oooh, and it's a cranky Monday, so this is perfect....
ReplyDeleteWith you on the whole cutting-in-on-the-freeway thing.
And a few more:
Rich men with bad toupees. They have money - do they not have mirrors?
The petty arrogance of the young and entitled: treating wait staff badly, for instance, just because they're so pleased with themselves that they're pulling down $100K in their first job out of college.
People who have loud conversations on my early morning bus. It's the early morning commute bus, fer
cryin' out loud. We're all tired. Shut. Up.
Cell phones in restaurants. I've seen, more than once, a couple in a very schmancy restaurant, probably spending $150 per person before wine, each on their cell phone describing their date to someone else. I've been tempted to just join their table and start eating their food - I doubt they'd notice.
Poor manners in movie theaters. This is not your living room, people, you're in public. We can see you, and we can hear you. We want to enjoy the movie we paid $10 for, not listen to you snorting and belching and smacking and doing a play by play of little Suzie's toilet training. Gak (there, Patty, got one in ;-)
I'd say more, but I have to go deal with something else that pisses me off - a powerpoint presentation.....
;-)
People that tell me, "Oh, I'm gonna publish a book." Like it's just a matter of having enough time.
ReplyDeleteAdd cell phones to all those items (i.e., cutting you off while on a cell, abandoning their carts while on a cell, etc.)and you've doubled it in spades.
ReplyDeleteMost heartbreaking to p.o. me: the single parent, temp or perm, with a night out with the kid(s) at MacD's and spending the whole time on the cell while the bored child toys with his food.
Hope there's a special level in Hell Dante didn't mention. . . .
Groupie
I hate to double post (right), but I was rushed this morning, and have a few peeves to add to a well established list.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit that shopping carts have lingered all day on my mind. Especially as I tend to park as far away from entrances as possible, so those not as mobile as myself, or shepherding small children can have a closer place. Seeing a stray just left there is just plain annoying. I can't corral them all.
However, to the list I'll add people who leave their trays on the table at fast food places (hello, that's why it's supposed to be fast?); closely tied to people who think it's funny to fiddle with the salt and pepper shakers; people who throw their butts out the window (and smokers who do the same); and bloggers who see fit to post only a single sexy photo of their rather ravishing mother-in-law.
Talk about teasers...I think there is a great wealth of naked tru---er, history to be explored there. The public demands the truth!
Clients who demand after hours appointments then don't show. Which is why I'm in the office right now.
ReplyDeleteOh man, you guys came up with some real zingers. And what a bummer, Dusty. Bill the bum for time and a half.
ReplyDeleteGo-Lo....now having had time to make a list of peeves, I present you with:
ReplyDeletePeople who jam you up on the freeway, pass you, get in front of you, and then slow down.As a counterbalance to Jeff's peeve, those who keep their indicator lights on for miles, or turn the opposite direction from their indicator lights.
Without going thru the litany of problems, including using cell phones, Idiots who drive....which seems like A LOT of drivers.
Those who FEIGN talking about things OTHER THAN THEMSELVES.
People with 25 items in a 12 items or less lane.
ALL infomercials touting a way to make a boat load of money with little or no effort
New drugs for freaking "restless leg syndrome" that have a side effect of sudden increased desire to gamble [WTF?]
Jon
Did I miss something? None of you mentioned cell phones while driving. I got hit once, backed into, and missed several times more.
ReplyDeleteThe Queen
Jon, did you ever hear that old L.A. joke?
ReplyDelete"Enough about me. What did YOU think of my last movie?"
TQ, don't get me started on that. I've almost been hit so many time by drivers with cell phones imbedded in their ears. Sheesh! Next year that will be illegal in L.A. It's about time.
ReplyDeletepatty
Rae, just read the rich guys with bad rugs line again. Laughing so hard...
ReplyDeletePatty, it's illegal here in the UK, but I'm afraid it doesn't make any difference!
ReplyDeleteRob
Here's a good one: When your Internet service provider gets bought out, and the new owners unilaterally change the address on your business e-mail so that you have to re-set-up the account and all the people who usually e-mail you get messages bounced back.
ReplyDeleteRob, I guess it's difficult to stop all those cheeky cell phone scofflaws, but wait until one of them causes an accident...
ReplyDeleteDusty, that's horrible news. My cable company, my telephone company, and my Internet provider are now all owned by the same conglomerate. I should start to worry. Right?
People who park illegally in handicapped spots because "it will just be a minute" and they can't be bothered finding a legit parking space 10 feet away.
ReplyDeletePeople who park blocking curb cuts because "it will just be a minute" leaving me to negotiate getting back on the sidewalk in oncoming traffic.
People who make "speeding ticket" jokes about my motorized scooter because they think they're relating to the poor woman who's handicapped (and who has never in 10 years heard that joke before).
But most of all, ambulatory people who have the utter amazing unbelievable brain-free gall to say "I need one of those". Best one? The woman riding her bicycle next to me in my neighborhood who simply DID NO GET what she had said but started huffing and puffing to show how HARD it was to ride a bike. (Yes, some people do seriously need them - i can tell the difference. MOST of the people who say that to me are clearly NOT in need of one, but think it's cute to joke about it.)
Andi, I agree. My mother is in a wheelchair and I'm always frustrated with how difficult it is to get her in and out of places. My favorite is the token handicap ramp that leads to a door that's impossible for even me to open.
ReplyDelete